Cancer-bits: Mysterious

Cancer is mysterious.

It grows fast or slow one day, one week, and does double-time the next. Now that Mom isn't seeing any doctors, only hospice workers, I feel so HELPLESS and wary. We went to doctor after doctor for years, working with them very closely on her care. I'm more involved than most I think, I'm a rabid researcher. Now that I have no information to act upon...I'm wary of what's going to happen next.

Every Tuesday and Friday Mom's wonderful hospice nurse, Yvonne, pays a visit. I try to be there for at least one meeting a week, hopefully both. She spends TIME talking with us about anything we all feel like sharing. We trust her. But now that I never have any real information about what's going on in my Mom's body, all I can do is wait. Wait for the next symptom, wait for a sign that things are changing. So I'm starting to dread those visits with kind Yvonne, wondering when things will get worse.

Mom seemed to have a sort of "remission". She stopped coughing up blood and her lungs have been clear. She's having some discomfort in her legs and hips and it's getting harder and harder for her to walk. But she keeps on trying, hoping that the exercise will make her stronger. That just makes me sad since I know that the truth is so much worse.

Well, on to work...

Suzzy (rhymes with buzzy)